Getting Down to the Business of Living


“Well, it’s over, but it’s really not over.”  These were the words my ex-husband spoke to me this evening, after attending his father’s funeral today.  Eleven days ago, this journey began with a massive stroke, and part of the journey ended today with family and friends gathering to share memories, laughter, tears, and stories together about the amazing man who was a husband, father to 9 children, grandfather to 23 grandchildren, great-grandfather to 5 great-grandchildren, Korean War veteran who was awarded the Purple Heart, retired member of the Police Dept., and the former father-in-law to this quirky southern girl.  He truly led a full and meaningful life, and now, all of us are left to follow his example to live full and happy lives, which includes being of service to others.

So, after taking another day off from chronicling my mission of doing just one thing for myself and others each day, I did my best to ease my way back into making an intentional effort to do both today.  The one thing that I managed to do for myself is what I am doing at this very moment.  I am writing again.  For nearly two weeks, I have been focused on the family crisis at hand, and everything else needed to take a back seat to helping my ex-husband and daughters cope with this loss and did not receive my full time, attention, and effort.  I was going through the motions and doing the best that I could.  Tonight, I awoke from a post-dinner nap feeling less sad and stressed than an hour earlier, and I recommitted myself to doing all of the things I need and want to do to help myself and others, including writing this blog.  This may not be one of my better blog posts, but it is a come back of sorts that I can build and improve upon each day.  I have made plans and set my intentions, and I am ready to begin again.

The one thing that I did for someone else was for one of my favorite old friends, who is funny, strong, and caring.  This friend is dealing with an unexpected health issue, and I was one of her sounding boards and supports, as she began the process of undergoing the arduous process of being tested and then waiting for the test results.  She is someone I called when the anxiety and depression consumed me, so, to be one of the people she turned to today when she was needed someone was humbling and meant a lot to me.  Regardless of the test results, I will be here for her to celebrate good news or to cope with not-so-good news, and I know that she will continue to survive and thrive, as will I.

Just one thing each day . . .

Categories: Just One Thing Each Day

Tags: , , , , ,

4 replies

  1. Gosh what a tough day, when my ex’s mother passed it was a difficult to be on the “an outsider”. My heart goes out to you, it’s hard enough to lose a loved one, but even more when the situation isn’t what we thought it would be.

    I am so grateful to have found you and I look forward to reading more!


    • Thanks so much for taking the time to share your own experience of being an “outsider”, as it really does help to know that I am not alone in this. It has been a surreal experience indeed. I enjoy your writing and admire your strength!


  2. Feeling for you through these tough times.
    Love that quote!
    Some days it is all we can do.


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