It is rare that I am ever at a loss for words, as I usually have something to say. There have been times in my life when I have felt as if my words fell on deaf ears, yet I still would keep talking or writing, as the case may be. Recently, though, I experienced a first. I cannot write.
As I continue to deal with a difficult personal situation that has triggered my anxiety and depression, along with everything that comes along with that dose of double trouble, I have more than enough thoughts swirling around in my mind, desperate to be set free, yet I cannot get the thoughts and feelings from my mind to my fingertips to the keyboard. They remain imprisoned in my mind, and I am in unfamiliar territory.
Perhaps, my version of writer’s block is because the feelings are too raw and the thoughts are too painful to communicate, even in a generic way yet, or perhaps, it is the result of finally running out of things to say. I have yet to determine the cause and don’t know what the outcome will be, but I know how it feels to be left “mute”. Unsettling. Scary. Confusing.
The feelings associated with my writer’s block mirror those feelings related to my personal situation, so, it is my hope that the resolution of both emotional “blocks” will come with time, patience, and healing. In the meantime, I will keep trying on both fronts, as I am holding on to the hope that these stumbling blocks are building blocks actually.
That’s another story . . .
Categories: That's Another Story