Stillness


At this point in the month, I usually can be found feeling somewhat stressed and exhausted, yet absolutely giddy with excitement.  I begin counting down the days, almost as soon as December begins, sometimes sooner.  As my anticipation increases, I silently, and sometimes not so silently, wish that it would just hurry up and get here already.  That is how I usually feel and what usually happens, but this year is a bit different.

My countdown continues, not until Christmas, but until one of my most favorite moments of the year, when the clock strikes midnight, signaling the end of the old year and the fresh start of the new year.  New Year’s Day is such special and sacred to me, which is why I normally am in a resolution making, intention setting, out with old and in with the new frenzy by now.  Only this year, I am not. 

I still am ready to welcome the collective clean slate and universal do over 2018 will offer in less than 2 weeks. I still am gathering my intentions and making my resolutions.  I still believe that all things are possible in the upcoming year.  This year, though, while I am still engaging in my usual preparations for the new year, I find that I, myself, am still.

This sense of stillness is new to me, but it seems to have made itself right at home in the midst of my end-of-the-year rituals.  It has not tempered my enthusiasm for the arrival of 2018, rather, it has enhanced it.  I am eager to end this year on a good note and to begin the new one on an even better note, albeit one that is more still.

2017 has been a year of unexpected and significant changes, and I am ending this year in very different place than when the year began, literally and figuratively.  It was not the worst year of my life, but it certainly was far from the best.  Barring unforseen events, 2017 will wind up in the #4 position on the Worst Year of My Life list.  It is a distance #4 at that, with 2015, 2011, and 2016 occupying the top 3 slots.

I have a much greater appreciation and understanding of allowing life the chance to unfold, instead of forcing an issue or trying to control or change it.  This year was definitely a refresher course in accepting people and circumstances as is and letting go of people, things, and beliefs that are not in my best interests. These lessons threw me for a loop, and I landed in this space of stillness. 

As I take all of the lessons of this past year with me into the new year, I am led by this newfound stillness.  I am determined to create a life that is more meaningful, in terms of my relationships, the work that I do, the intentions that I set, and the goals that I pursue.  This year is about the daily practices to do my part in putting 2018 on the Best Year of My Life list.   It goes well beyond the hype and fanfare that kicks off the new year, before fizzling out before the first month even ends. 

I don’t know what the new year will bring to me, but I do know what I will bring to it. I will greet 2018 with this stillness, my big heart, my open mind, my hustle, my goals and intentions, and my belief that this really could be the best year of my life.  I am still, and I am ready.

That’s another story . . .



Categories: That's Another Story

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3 replies

  1. I love reading your words!
    Stillness is needed in my life also, in my family’s life.
    Sending you good thoughts in 2018🎉
    Amy😊

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  1. Stillness – The Militant Negro™

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