We are less than a week into the new year, and I have chosen to break a number of my resolutions. And I am okay with that. Yes; you read that correctly. I not only chose to not keep the resolutions I genuinely made on the first of the year, but I am okay with it.
In an ideal world, I would set my intentions and make my resolutions, and then, once made and set into motion, I would never break them and fulfill each one. That would be precisely what would happen in an ideal world. My world, however, is perfectly flawed, as am I. So, that is definitely not what happened, but here is what did happen. Flaws and all.
Usually, I greet the new year with unbridled enthusiasm and set off to do everything right. I am hyper aware of every thought, feeling, and action I take to ensure that I do not lose sight of my goal. Then, when I inevitably veer from my best intentions, I become frustrated with myself and tell myself that I will start over tomorrow or next week or next month or next year, if ever. It is a maddening exercise in delayed gratification and unfulfilled goals. But not this year.
While I still broke some of my intentions this week, I also broke the cycle of punishing myself for the less than perfect start to 2018 and further punishing myself by giving up on myself and my intentions for the rest of the year. A rough start sometimes leads to a smooth finish, and the last time I checked, perfection has never been my goal in life. Somehow, though, I lost sight of that and held myself to impossibly high standards that, in turn, held me hostage.
This week, I was reminded that resolutions do work, but only if I do the work to make them a reality. That’s where choice enters the equation. When I created my intentions built around the word meaningful and devised a plan of action that involved flipping the script, I felt indescribable feelings of joy, anticipation, and hope. These intentions resonate with my heart and soul, and they truly are meaningful.
Every time, I said, did, or thought something that did not support my intentions, I immediately felt it. And it did not feel good. It never feels good to realize that I am the one who is choosing an old habit or thought pattern, instead of choosing a new and better way of thinking, feeling, and behaving.
Once I acknowledged the choice that I had made and what the consequence was, I resolved to recommit to my intentions in that moment. Not tomorrow. Not next week. Not next month. And certainly not next year. These intentions mean too much to me to abandon, even for a day.
January 1st was the starting point, not the finishing line, for this year’s intentions and resolutions. Every moment of every day is an opportunity to move closer or further from the meaningful relationships, work, and life I am focused on creating and sustaining. Today, I am choosing to move forward and to continue to learn from my choices. It’s already a great year, and it is only going to get better.
That’s another story . . .
Categories: That's Another Story